Saturday, July 11, 2015

Jealousy and Envy

I have a confession...
I am having a jealousy issue.

It all started when I started this blog. I started writing and then I joined Facebook pages for bloggers. I joined other social media outlets like Instagram and Twitter. I started following other bloggers and then other social media users on those social media outlets. Well, it turns out that most of the people that I follow are moms, dads and parents. A lot have babies. I am now JEALOUS!


I really did not start out my adulthood wanting children. Even when some of my friends were having babies, I really did not want them. Yes, they were cute and I loved them. I would take my best friend's daughter for a day or two to give her some time to herself with her husband. But I did not really want my own.



As I have gotten older, however, that has changed. My best friend has two children, all of my cousins have kids. Even a girl that I work with recently had a baby. I WANT ONE!

Other things are causing jealousy also. Several people that I follow on social media have been on amazing trips recently, one girl went all over Europe. Several people live in their RVs or vans and travel all over the country or even the world. I want to travel like that...as long as it does not involve an airplane, I am good. I want to travel to all of the places that I want to see. I want to have the freedom to be in Alaska one week and Florida a few weeks later (and not have to worry about missing work).

Another envious thing recently has been my body. The point of this blog was first and foremost as a weight loss journal. I have lost about 50 pounds but I want to lose more...NOW! I follow several women who have lost a lot of weight and they look amazing. I want that. I have been a big girl all my life. I really can't even imagine what it would be like to be smaller than I am now. To be able to go into ANY store and buy something.

I know, I know, it takes time. I have to do the work. But I want it. I want all of these things so much.


I have found this quote to be exceptionally true recently. I want to travel, I want to be smaller, I want a child... I am going through the days thinking about these things...and I am wasting those days. I need to get back to my life. Get healthy so that I can be smaller and possibly have a child. Stop being jealous of everyone else who is smaller or has a child. Stop envying the people who travel full time or even for a week or two. Stop wanting to win the lottery (well, I draw the line there!)









18 comments:

  1. Our problem as humans is that we're never happy with what we have. I'm so guilty of this too! When all my friends were having babies, I wasn't even married yet and I SO wanted what they had. Now I'm married with a child, and now I'm pining after the "perfect" body and jealous of those who have the willpower to just lose that weight. I need to just stop and enjoy what I have. =)

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    1. Thank you Jamie, that is exactly the case. We are never happy with what we have, we always want something else. I am with you, I think I will try enjoying what I have!

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  2. Boy, can I relate! I am childless too and I envy people who are parents, especially bloggers. It seems as though the entire blogosphere is about motherhood. I can also totally relate to the envy regarding your body. I don't know what to do about this but just wanted to let you know you're not alone.

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    1. Thank you! I think we need to do what Jamie said above and just enjoy what we have!

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  3. This is such an excellent post. I actually sat down and read the whole thing instead of just skimming over it. Thank you so much for sharing it with us and congrats on losing 50 lbs!

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    1. Thank you, Trisha, I have a long way to go to my goal, but I have come a long way already. Thank you for taking the time to read my post.

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  4. I completely get it. I want. I want to be able to earn a living from my blog and envy those who do. I want to lose the last 25 pounds but I'm stuck, and envy those who have lost more and are still losing. I have to remind myself often to count my blessings.

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    1. Robin, I agree, I am going to start being grateful for what I have and stop focusing on the things that other people have, not to say that I can't work toward the goal...Thank You!

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  5. Congrats on the weight loss! That is such a great accomplishment. I always want to lose weight and then it doesn't happen as fast as I want it to and I get bummed. I am not a patient person when it comes to that. I think it's hard not to be jealous of other people's lives but I try to remind myself that is just a snap shot. We have no clue what else is going on.

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    1. Katie, that is very true, the fact that the other person's life SEEMS perfect is probably far from the truth. I can relate to wanting to lose weight NOW. This is why I have always been a big girl. I don't lose fast enough so I give up, but not this time. This time I know that it has to happen slowly in order to be healthy and to keep it off. Thank You

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  6. Hi Annie, I think it's brave for you to admit this jealousy- I've been in the same boat. I LOVE connecting with other bloggers but often have blogger envy, too. Turn this envy into positive motivation to make the things you want happen. Make a list of your goals and come up with a reasonable plan (short and long term) to attain those goals.

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    1. Thank you Lindsay, I will take this advice, I am going to still work toward the goals that I have, but not compare myself to the others that I follow.

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  7. I agree with you about Roosevelt's quote. It is right on target. I think we all try to live by those words but it's a constant struggle. But I guess being positive and joyful is a good goal.

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    1. Sonia, thank you. I really do believe that Comparison is the Thief of Joy. We can not be happy if we are comparing ourselves to others. But it is hard not to do when it is all over social media.

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  8. Ah...Kurt Cobain...he said it well. Be the person you and don't ever look around for comparison. You have no idea what is really going on in anyone else's life so even if they have kids, it's possible they are in an abusive relationship? And if they travel a lot, maybe it's because they have no friends or family to spend time with at home? I know, I shouldn't project, but the grass isn't always greener. I have to catch myself sometimes when I get caught in the jealousy loop and snap out of it. It won't ever serve any purpose other than to make me feel worse rather than better about my life despite thinking it might be a motivator. Again, just be you! Thanks for sharing via Fab Female Bloggers.

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    1. Thank you Beth. I have not really thought about it that way, although I am starting to. I will work to keep myself out of that loop. And if I get stuck I will remember your comment and "snap out of it!"

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  9. Hi Annie,
    Losing 50 lbs is a great accomplishment. Sounds like you are on a path. The path can be in a beautiful meadow one day, then maybe a dark part of the forest the next. Do your best to enjoy every day on the path regardless of where it takes you. Because it's not about the destination, it's about the journey. Embrace the journey.

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    1. Thank you Carol. I love how you describe the journey. It most certainly does feel like somedays I am in a beautiful meadow and others are a dark forest.

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